Justified?

Do you think its alright to not tell her
why is there something that you need to hide,
to keep from her,what's really going on
Is it in any way justified?

Do you think she will never come to know
her intuition wont hint to her of the times you lied,
how long can you carry on this way
how long will you take her for a ride?

Can you imagine what would happen the day
truth shakes up her peace and pride,
how would she ever trust you again
and how ugly you would feel inside?

How will you restore her faith back on you
how will her insecurities subside,
you might somehow tie your threads back together
but what will you do of the knots that appear alongside?

You say you cannot leave her
that by now its already become too complicated
but its not going to get any simpler from here,is it?
and the social reactions that you're scared of are just too overrated

You say you  cant help carrying on,either
and that you have really, truly tried,
but think again before hushing your knowing heart
my friend,the answer is right there inside.

Do consider,if its good to continue what you need to keep under wraps

or if its better to admit that your relationship can no longer survive,

whatever you decide,tell her before someone else does

before your companionship loses its final chance to thrive.

I know that life seems unfair to you
that somewhere you feel emotionally deprived,
but looks like life hasnt been any kinder to her
to the both of you,so far,the beauty of love seems to have been denied.

And i know its no ones fault really
maybe some things just arent meant to be,
so unlock all the meaningless chains
and reflect if its time to set both of yourselves free.

I know you find yourself at this weird juncture
when your can feel each others love and hate collide,
but life's too short to waste in fighting with yourself
and happiness cannot for long be mechanically implied

So treat her as your friend for once
confide in her if you think it would be best to part.
so you both may have another chance at real happiness
to move on in life and make a new start.

In the end i want to render this thought to you
that if something is gnawing you somewhere inside...
then things are definately going not so great
and its time to take another good look at life.

This once and  forever more from now,live life just the way you want
doesnt matter what the world thinks,set all that aside,
but whatever you do,my friend,to your own heart and soul
let your actions always be justified...


© Dr. Manvi Gupta 2010 www.manvigupta.com

CHEERS to LIFE ;)

Just when we all think
ahhh i have figured out life,

it throws us off the cliff.

Just when we think

we're feeling down and lazy,

it wakes us up with a kick.

Just when it seems 

we're all sorted out,

it pops up a newly designed issue to sort.

Just when it seems 

life will be smooth from here on

it gives us a nasty jolt.

Just when it feels

we're all settled now,

it takes our job away.

Just when it feels

we're above everyone,

someones's there to deliver a slap on the face.

Just when we need

to reach somewhere on time,

its sets up a traffic jam.

Just when we need

to feel we know exactly what to do,

it turns upside down,the entire plan

A roller coaster ride

that we like to enjoy,

at times we fall off

and scratch our sides,

sometimes we scream on

with excitement and dont give a care,

at times we wait in horror

for it to turn off the scare.

And just when we realise

we've found all the answers,

it throws us a brand new question.

Maybe thats exactly the mistake

it isnt to be figured out at all,

rather allowed to be completely random.

Because just when we crib

the day just could'nt get any worse,

a stranger smiles so warmly

and restores back its worth.

Just when we complain

about losing a cherished belonging,

it surprises us many days later

long after we have stopped looking.

Looks like when we take it for granted

life says what the heck!

when we imagine things to be forever

its gives us a reality check.

Its our buddy,we should simply raise our glass to,

and savour its mysteriously brewed wine,

say CHEERS to LIFE aloud !

go to bed and sleep off just fine ;)

© Dr. Manvi Gupta 2010 www.manvigupta.com

Just Hold Me...

No bunch of flowers
No exotic sunsets

Nothing's as divine,

your hand in mine...

No crazy presents

No fancy restaurants

Peace i cant define,

your hand in mine...

Its been so long

so many things going wrong

kept my heart away from you

kept me from hearing it too

Want to drown out all the noise

say out loud what i always knew-

Let our silence unfold me

so Baby just hold me...

No useless chatter

No melodrama

A little quiet time,

your hand in mine...

No more analysis

No tangled conversations

All things fall in line,

your hand in mine...

Its been so long

so many things going wrong

kept my heart away from you

kept me from hearing it too

Want to drown out all the noise

say out loud what i always knew-

Let our silence unfold me

so Baby just hold me...

So steal some moments

Tiptoe in the lane

Hum our favourite song

Whisper out my name

Listen to the sighs

Hush away my fear

Smile upon my shyness

As i slip a tear
dance to our dreams
See our eyes shine
Play with my hair

Let fingers entwine

My head on ur shoulder

Your hand in mine

It was always you,my heart told me...

So Baby just hold me...

© Dr. Manvi Gupta 2010 www.manvigupta.com

Lets Smell The Rain :)

Can hear the thunder

calling out my name

Can sense the lightening

coaxing my window pane

Can see the trees

holding out their arms

telling me to breathe

shed away my qualms

Now there is the wind

knocking on my door

there's no use resisting

cant hold it anymore...

So lets smell the rain

Be children again

Run around in vain

Act all insane

Splash up the puddles

Forget life's muddles

Quench out our souls

Plug all the holes

Let go of all control

No pain left to console

Dance away the past

Coz nothing ever lasts

Drench ourselves clean

Live a brand new dream;

So lets smell the rain...

and SMILE once again :)

Can see my surroundings

suddenly transform

The fragrance of the earth

turning the senses on

Nature rejoicing

The clouds playing games

Colours shining brighter

nothing is the same

All the dust melting

away from every surface

Rocks,roads or hearts

now nothing can escape...

So lets smell the rain

Be children again

Run around in vain

Act all insane

Splash up the puddles

Forget life's muddles

Quench out our souls

Plug all the holes

Let go of all control

No pain left to console

Dance away the past

Coz nothing ever lasts

Drench ourselves clean

Live a brand new dream;

So lets smell the rain...

and SMILE once again :)

© Dr. Manvi Gupta 2010 www.manvigupta.com

SandCastle

You were no gallant prince

and i was no banished princess,

no white horse to rescue your lady

to enchanted wilderness.

This was no technicolor movie

there was never any magic

no happily ever after,

it was destined to be tragic.

Wasnt you who made the wind,blow

wasnt you who made it rain,

wasnt you who made the sun,shine

was you though,who planted the pain.

There was no reason to think

you'd stand by me when all hell broke lose,

you were a coward who took the first ride home

when you got the bad news.

This was no fairytale

there would be no forever,

perfect combination,i was foolish enough

and you were adequately clever;

the kingdom we built

the world we designed,

was nothing but a sandcastle

easily swept away with the tide.

It was a frivilous pursuit

to weave myths to my dreams,

took you no time to join back the real world

leaving me in entangled sumwhere in between.

You left without giving any answers

so i dug holes into my conscience,

desperately finding faults with myself

but now its all begun to make sense.

'

After ending my internal quest

and snapping out of my rapture

i realised,you had painted a mirage

which had no inkling of a future.

There was no reason to think

you'd stand by me when all hell broke loose,

you were a coward who took the

first ride home when you got the bad news.

This was no fairytale

there would be no forever,

perfect combination,i was foolish enough

and you were adequately clever;

the kingdom we built

the world we designed,

was nothing but a sandcastle

easily swept away with the tide.

© Dr. Manvi Gupta 2010 www.manvigupta.com

Forgotten but Not Forgiven

Thought i had forgotten you
thought you didnt exist anymore
Thought my life waz getting sorted now,

from long being helplessly twisted.

I did'nt realise what had crept in,

till i saw the pattern,

how was i to know,

you had befriended my own satan.

Now everytime i bring myself down,

i hear you laughing,
pulling me down under,

till i hit rock bottom.

You live in my evils,

the times i act mean,

the times i judge others,

and my thoughts are unclean.

I thought i had just lost you,

but there waz more to that,it seems,

with you left my pride,my confidence

and my esteem.

you conveniently dwell,

in my favourite memories,

when i looked and felt my best

and later unconsolably grieved.

You've gnawed me into my core,

i'm so hollow inside.

There's no place anymore,

for someone else to reside.

You live in my weaknesses,

situations when i feel awkward,

the moments im in a dilemma

when i act like a coward.

The days i feel shaky,

and nothing goes my way,

times when i freeze,

or feel like running away.

You took what was best in me,

and left your worst behind.

I still want to be be the person,

whose picture you carved in my mind .

So many hitches grip me

as i sink into this mess.

You seeped in so deep,

that now i'm pouring of shallowness.

You stole into my shadow,

there was no where to hide,

how far could i run from myself

carrying my own demolition inside.

You kept feeding my failures,

and eventually consumed me,

then with the final blow of your desertion,

you made sure that you doomed me.

but today i'm taking back your powers,

my psyche dat,you toyed with,on useless basis.

Throwing out your ideas,your impact

every bit of your demonic traces.

No longer can you dictate my dreams,

no longer can you rob my sleep,

wont run after the the image you drew,anymore,

i'm throwing out everybit of you dat i keep.

I want to be who i was,

as if you never came

as if i never felt your presence,

and never called out your name.

To love myself without any judgements

as i did before,

to finally be free of you,

and now you can be sure-

To no more insanity,

shall i allow myself to be driven,

someday,you will be forgotten,

but surely never forgiven.

© Dr. Manvi Gupta 2010 www.manvigupta.com

Nothing but the Truth...

Nothing but the truth

is all that i dearly hold

Life isnt going to be easy anymore,

az i took this pledge,i waz told.

Blood dripped everywhere,

tears lined my road,

as i paved through my life,

holding my double edged sword.

It either hurt my neighbour

or thrust through my own heart

It brought me closer to myself

from all else,it drew me apart.

Everything came for a price

the price i wasnt willing to pay

It would be simple if i bowed down to the world

but it never came to that day.

Countless failures buried,

some victories unspoken

After many dark endless nights

i have risen,enlightenedly woken

I stand here today,

ready to walk on ahead

With a smile upon my face

and my feet on the burning coal bed.

Life iznt going to be easy,i know,

as i wait for the next moment to unfold

Still nothing but the truth

is all dat i dearly hold.

© Dr. Manvi Gupta 2010 www.manvigupta.com

My First Attempt at sketching after 10 long years!!

© Dr. Manvi Gupta 2010 www.manvigupta.com

Hello Sunshine...

Hello there! :) today after a very long time i have gotten up (and out of my bed)early, with the "hey look,its still dawn" consolation inspite of it being 8 oclock oready n ticking... n add to that,giving myself the excuse of

"awwe,wat the hell,u cant expect me to get up earlier than this,i hardly slept last nite"n az i rub my eyes open half in disbelief at the impossible feat i waz a luking to attempt n the other half coz my eyeballs were tugging at my eyelids n coaxing them back to their rightful shut position,swear,it really happens that way..u think im kiddin huh? ahhhhhh...now that my eyes are finally in d "hold it,great,freeze" commandment, i now see what i have been missing all this while...peace....n thus my peaceful day starts with a massive fight with........with my............self ofcourse...what were u thinkin see we have single beds here n my roomie'z r outta town,so cut out the wink u were gonna gimme n concentrate on my story.....hmmm so d dilemma was whether its a good idea to actually leave this nice cozy,comforting cocoon of mine....while im clinging helplessly to a small heating pad between my knees n hands simltaneously....hmmm 2 minutes n counting...ohh get up it would b great to catch the morning before it slips away.....awwwe cmmonnn u slept at 4,wats d point of gettin up n having ur head groggy all day,reminding u of ur foolishness for d rest of d entire day....so 3 minutes slip away,n i remember to call up n wake up a friend (can u imagine i made such a promise when im gettin up at 2 o clock myself for last nearly entire..errrr i wont say how long..my parents might b reading this!!!)...awwwe why do u have to make such dumb commitments....n dammit,u cant break promises....awwe ok,i'll make a 2 minute call n go back 2 sleep...yeah that makes sense...ha...my friend will b impressed n im sure i wud promote a commited image of mine...ok here i go...wake up buddy...(n lemme go back to my sleep!! see what i huge favour im doing to you,one that i never even do for myself!)....my friend had been up half an hour back....oh hell u cudve messeged me n let me know yaknow!!!! i cudv slept 3 more anxiety free minutes...dont u see how precious the time rite now is,so much for selfless friendship...anyway....so where were we,hmmm to sleep or not to sleep in this warmmm fuzzzyy cozzy,"pulling me deeper into its covers,promising me deep dreams" bed of mine!!!oooo

n i think az i do every mornin az i open the door for the cleaning lady,what is "d bloody good reason"for me to get up so early after all,its cold n foggy n im on leave!! n....but surprisingly today i do have an answer......hmmm a very dear friend said last night dat it has been paining him to see how i havent been taking care of my health n my sleep,when i so easily can....ummm well buddy i cant let u down,ur words mean so much to me n so do the eloquent words of another dear friend telling me to "godammit catch some goddamn sleep for god'ssake" n hey wat the hell,last afternoon,i registered to have a my own blog for the first time in life...oooo im gonna design my own page,yipeeee,n wow it says my own name,rite here as its address.....ooo im squealing now...what am i gonna write about....awww who cares.....no ones gonna read it anyway,errrr still, what am i gonna write about....cmmon its ur first piece of blogging.....still who cares..... my excited,restless fingers just waiting to break loose from my hand to run to the keyboard.....theyve been empty all this while....havent written for soo long now,i started when i waz a kid,since the age of nine....with dry soul patches which wud extend for long mute years....hey stop ur sob story,its boring n no one wants to hear it...come back to the happy,inpiring article....yes yes where were we....so well i hold my groggy "post hangover like" head in my hands,threatening it to get rid of the stupid ache n decide to give "gettin up" a "lill try,just for today...errr...just for now...errr...lets just see what happens.....

hmm what shall i do first,got a great idea!! so i get outta my room(still threatening my head to get better!) n walk up a few steps to dis sacred, "very less visited at this time of the day place"n here i go.........morning pee..........ahhhhhhh iz there a better feelin......ahhhh....az i feel a shiver,n my feelin less n less cold with every second.....ahhh i repeat iz dere a better feelin than this? hah divine...hmmm now what..oh yes milk....i wont get it after another 5 minutes.....run.....gosh i realised that people actually stand in such a long line for this everyday......they look at me n think....oh how come her majesty haz obliged them with her presence.....correction....they think nothing,who has d time....oh im just imagining things....my guilt iz taking its sadistic revenge from me...i stand in the line....hey wait a minute everyone has got their own "specially picked up by themselves" tea/coffee mug!! r u gonna use d stupid glasses!!....hmmm wat bout d que.....chuck the goddamn que,n get ur ass moving....hah im getting my own mug...u all,jus wait n see...i announce to the entire crowd.......in my own head of course...so i run up to my room,these r the rare times i thank god for my room being on d first floor....ahh mug outta d drawer....here we go...n jus before i leave,i open the curtains...ahh the sunshine(actually....theres none,therez only fog dat i can see n not see,maybe i shudve called it " Hello Fog on my first morning thingy day") i stand by d door to steal a few seconds to smell my cup.....hmmmm its smelling of d lovely camomile tea my ma sent me....dat i snugly had lastnite.....warming my freezin hands...in my lovely cuddly dudly bed....oh not d bed again,focus Mani,focus... u wont get milk standing here any longer......run... jus a few minutes left..... i enter the mess this time with my head held high,beaming with my "specially picked by ma n not exactly by me" mug....n get the milk n choose my table...ahhh warmmm milk in my hands.......wat a feelin....ooooo... thinkin hmmm dere iz sumthin called az "breakfast" for which these silly people stand in the que for every morning pushing n nudging while every minute theyre gettin late for work,n how conveniently such a concept doesnt exist in my world! hmmm i ponder some more on that n it strikes me....hey i shud get my newspaper n little bit get to know what the hell is happening in the rest of the world,so i get up quickly n wash my "much hyped n written bout by now" mug coz i still want it to retain sum of the last nights aro"ma"...sigh..)...i hop along to get me the paper......looking at the dhobi n newspaper guy,with a "bow down to me,fellas" smile! n they smile back,handing me over....not an award but the newspaper bill...errrr....happens...keep smiling,keep up ur poise...continue walking back with ur chin up.......reach d stairs n .....run up....ooooo wherez my laptop???cant wait to get my hands on it....no... no wait.....light the lamp first.......awwwe ok,ur rite......so i do dat n for d first time officially thanking god,my parents,my dear friends me for tolerating me n not disowning at times of great temptation to do so ......okay,done....keyboard here i come.....no no stretch a bit first.....awwe all right,but ur bugging me now......ok quick...done...keyboard....come to mama!!! noooo read d paper,Mani ur a pain...(my lovely family n friends would happily agree to this one).ok quick luk at d headlines...the only relevant news i found waz that theyre allowing prepaid phones in my state...phew..finally we're out of the dark ages n yipee,byebye monster phone bills,n hello more money savings... for useless but nonetheless exciting shopping parades!! n no opening facebook first thing u log in !! just focus on blogging for now,stop nagging,will ya.ooooooo let me put on sum nice music....to inspire me to write sumthing good...ummm how about the piano piece ive fallen in love recently....oh kay,u tube n bingo...i have this lovely music playin......on d endless "drive me nuts till it comes out of my ears" mode...ahhh nice...hmm i think i wont use the earphones....i dont wanna miss the "nearly gone,fast approching afternoon, mornin sounds"....so now i can hear this nice piano piece with special horn harmonies by the traffic n an occasional tweets of birds....(not the tweets in twitter silly,dats d word n sound we stole from the birds).....n man am i thankful for being able to hear some lazy birds like me even at dis hour coz else my conscience would have nudged me to stop fooling around n to rename this as i "Hello( Overhead n therefore its afternoon,no point writing this piece of crap)Sun"...

Ohkay so after all this fuss what shall i write about........ummm........errrrr.....n some "scratching my head sounds" later i realise that....errrr since i have no masterpiece ideas( i know u want to kill me...having been reading so far along by now n expecting atleast some useful thing to come outta dis so u wudnt start cursin urself now)...errrr lets jus write about today n now( coz nothings else is coming to my head) n ofcourse coz ive kept an inspiring title...n errrr i should, yaknow sorta take it forward from there....right...yes...n also so whenever my head hurts n i curse myself for "what the hell waz d need to do the im so health conscious so i get up early drama"...i'll show myself this page (which iz hurting ur head now!!)...n tell myself....seeeee this iz why i got up see......n hmmm lets see, wat else will i tell my cursin self.....think....think....errrrr....and.....ofcourse,not to forget the fact that ive taken a new step towards unscrewing my throughly screwed up life n sleep.....hah there i have it now......n now before u applaud me n urself for being so positively inspired by this apparently professing"rise n shine" article,let me tell u my brilliant observation......this piano piece sucks man,its bugging me now....yawn.....n i have run out of anymore "mini-no good stories" to tell u.....yawn...n .....so after reaping all the benefits of the d beautiful morning n nature...yawn...lets all get back in the bed....yawn...n catch sum nice refreshing sleep...yawn...az i am going to....after keepin u all up reading this,haha,gotcha!! ......hey im kidding.......cmmon im not hittin the bed now after all this.....atleast im not dumb enough to write dat down...(even if dats what i eventually do!)hey i got a image to take care of here !!!!(n oops there are two missed calls by my sweet friend to check if ive slept back oready after letting him know that his inspiring words had actually worked!!)....drats.....so much for my image!!!

well on this note,goodbye everybody,good day....n oh about the message conveyed by this "morning thingy article".......errrr ....i dunno man,i'm bored myself by now....just do what u feel like...each one to his own.....yawn..... ;)

© Dr. Manvi Gupta 2010 www.manvigupta.com