slave

i walk undaunted
but am i really free?
i live in a cage
wouldn't you agree?

for i'm a slave to my failures
a professional amateur
to ticking of the clock
killing time as it kills me back
a propensity to escape
from the fate i create
a slave to wanting attention
to defying convention
forever craving intensity
that i steal from my priorities
a slave of my compulsions
of untimely diversions
an expert at procrastination
with a recipe for self-demolition
to the chemicals in the brain
which decide how much and when i'm sane
hooked to television,taking refuge in sleep
promising an alternate self-designed reality

a slave to junk food and junk information
to patterns that repeat for no rhyme or reason
creating crisis to get me to action
extreme pressure to get a reaction
restlessness to trickle out my creativity
pain to trigger my thresholds of sensitivity
a slave to delusion that someone else will save me
being a creeper on every standing tree
a slave to excuses and outside stimuli
not taking responsibility for the demons that constitute me
waiting for something to wake up my dead motivation
quitting at the first hint of frustration
a cripple with all limbs intact
who chooses to brood than to act
a compulsive liar, fooling the self
faking having potential and seeking a magic potion to success
My! how i have gotten myself into this beautiful mess!

i look at myself with outrage
having made a home of this cage
if I could step out this door
that has been open all along
I'd be a free soul today
writing a different song!