Indecision!

What is real?
All i've ever been
Or who i'm being now?

What is the truth?
All that i havent done
Or all i plan to do now?

What has more shelf life?
My long standing history
Or my recent present

What is worth choosing?
A safe mundane life
Or the promising unknown

Who must i bank on?
Those who know me enough to hate me yet still want me...
Or those who see me anew and trust me enough to bet on me

because one moment i'm  happy
And in the other dejected
One moment I'm loving
And in the other, disconnected

In this circumstance,
How can i know what i truly feel
How does one tell
Illusions from what's real!

But as i take my time
That i cant define exactly
I seem to drag everyones' lives
Indefinately

i recall what someone said and perhaps its fair to agree
If i dont take my decisions soon enough-
then someone else will take them for me!