Best trip home ever! :)

© Dr. Manvi Gupta 2010 www.manvigupta.com

Today,i got a much needed,long overdue haircut after years!! feel liberated somehow!

© Dr. Manvi Gupta 2010 www.manvigupta.com

i am

i am...
perhaps
a soldier
distrusting my arms
a sage
incapable of keeping my calm
a mystic
unsure of my powers
a free spirit
caged in lost hours
a dreamer
scared to fall asleep
giver of promises
that i cannot keep
a visionary
hesitant to tread on a new path
a strategist
uncertain of the aftermath
a gambler
anxious of taking a chance
a realist
living in a permanent trance
a wanderer
reluctant to head for the unknown
a leader
dreading to walk alone
a rebel
fearful to question
uneasy to peep into
my own reflection
unsettled about  my past
afraid of my future
wary of myself
as much as of any other
awkward to be happy
aquainted with pain
terrified of making
the same mistakes again
an explorer
yearning to discover new world's
but unwilling
to even leave my room
desperately seeking
the sanctuary of bliss
seemingly heading
to the asylum of doom
i am though
the tempest itself
that has brewed up
passions galore
i realise
i am as much
the north star
that shall guide my ship
home to placid shores.
what ever hurdles
life designs in my plans
i shall endeavour
to do the best that i can
a tireless Warrior
determined to stand strong
that is truly who
i am...

© Dr. Manvi Gupta 2010 www.manvigupta.com

Remember

cant Remember
when we parted
what it was like without you
being broken-hearted
cant Remember
when we found each other back
feels like you never left
as if we continued without any gap

you were always here by my side
though being many geographical miles away
watching over me like the sky above my head
so i could never step wrong and lose my way
nodding your head at my mistakes
hoping one day i'd see clearly through the blurred
the value of what we had once found and lost
while sending me your care unsaid yet heard

cant Remember
when exactly things started to go wrong
when did we decide to quit trying
and agree to move on
when we figured it was best to stay away
than causing so much hurt to one another
i think we gave in to our ownselves
but never gave up on each other

maybe thats why our precious bond
continued to stay strong
without ever letting us know
it silently carried on
invisible threads connecting our souls
intuition guiding our actions through
pulling us into the universe of oneness
two diverse aura's taking on the same hue

cant remember
what it was like
when you hadnt yet,quite
touched my life
but now forevermore i'm truly glad
that i can no longer recall any such things
my heart only seems to Remember
the joyful times you bring :)

© Dr. Manvi Gupta 2010 www.manvigupta.com

Finally got Ma to read my blog,so thrilled,feels like a huge achievement! Thanks Ma,means the world to me! :)

© Dr. Manvi Gupta 2010 www.manvigupta.com

afraid

afraid to walk ahead
i might break my bones
lest i fall
afraid to run back
so in the meantime
i prefer to crawl

afraid to look up
my overambitious expectations
might crash onto me
afraid to stoop down
my insatiable guilt
might suck up my very being

afraid to mute down the voice within

incase i lose all touch 

with my reality

afraid to connect with my spirit
incase it takes over
completely

seeing which,you,whom i dearly love
would try desperately to
and fix up the underlying defect
failing which,you might manage to
understand me a little
but its something you'd never be able to accept

afraid of giving into your emotions
or getting carried away by my whims
to end up being fooled
of succeeding without you to celebrate it with
else losing the battle
to be ridiculed

crouching in the middle
of the crazy road to survival
afraid to reach either side
i wait to be run over
by time and consequence
so i never again have to decide

© Dr. Manvi Gupta 2010 www.manvigupta.com

Abstract Painting

An Abstract Painting,

Oblivious,
to what it was
conceived to evoke;

Hanging onto
some meaningless wall;

Trying to camouflage
somehow into

a starkly loud background.
Lines
crashing all over;
Patterns

repeating and criss crossing
for no good reason;

My real self
blotted by ink drops;

My fancies
absorbed by the canvas;

My future washed up with
ornamental tones;

Etched by a brush
steered by a hand ,

i will never know or recognise;

To manifest some absurd theme

no one can quite understand.

Bold impressions some places
otherwise blank spaces.

What were you thinking

my Master Painter?

How many times
during this creation

did you change your mind?

Were there
any dreams in your eyes?

Did you dilute
my thoughts too much?

Did you spill in
too many Blues?

Looks like you accidently
mixed Black with White

for its become all Grey now.

Sometimes your brush moved
way too harshly;
Sometimes so delicately

as if to caress me;

Sometimes it barely seemed
to touch me at all.

You chalked out
Starry nights
that silhouetted to reveal
Light Blue skies.
At times,
you simply painted
the grass far Greener
on the other side.

You carved the Scarlet letter
on my heart,

and then schematically
Varnished it
with some sweet Baby Pink
childhood memories;
Cleverly contrasted
with a,hard to forget
Incandescent adolescence.

So now i turn White

at the thought
of starting afresh,

Pretending
there are no layers
beneath this coat.
I realise-
My lines
can be coloured

can be covered

but cannot be erased;

My basic texture
can falter

can be altered

but cannot be fazed.
I wonder
what will your genius
create next?
whilst i marvel at
your flawless craftsmanship.
I admit,sometimes
foolishly enough,
lost to the obvious shades
from your palette;
My being doesnt realise
it is the embodiment,
the breathing Canvas itself;
the fortunate beholder
of your artistic expression;
The small yet significant part
of a greater Panorama.
And thereafter i see
the Blacks,Greys

even the Blues

blend beautifully,
in perfect harmony
into a luminous Gold
ever-enriching
mystical Masterpiece.

© Dr. Manvi Gupta 2010 www.manvigupta.com

I'm 25 today!! one quarter of my life over!! :) you know what that means? means its time to pour the next round,the next quarter please! ;)Cheers everybody!

© Dr. Manvi Gupta 2010 www.manvigupta.com